Category — Thoughts to ponder

A few weeks ago I was delivering a sermon in a synagogue. In the middle of my sermon, I noticed someone get up and walk out. Of course, I was pretty hurt, but I managed to contain my feelings and concluded the sermon. At the end of the service, I went over to the fellow and asked him why he’d left.
“Oh,” he said, “nothing personal, Rabbi. I went to get a haircut.”
Of course, I was relieved. But then it occurred to me to ask him, “But why didn’t you get the haircut before my sermon?”
“Rabbi, I didn’t need one then!”
***
In desperate need of a suit in honor of the holidays, I went shopping in the mall.
My first stop was a nice big store with a beautiful display. A pleasure to shop in – or so I thought. I went over to the first suit that caught my eye, an elegant blue striped suit, and casually checked the price tag. To my shock and consternation, it read $4000!
Obviously, I had walked into an extremely upscale store – the price range here was completely out of my league.
Not to feel like a total loser, I made sure to try on the jacket and photograph myself in it. And so, at least for a quick moment, I felt like a millionaire. And it was even caught on camera!
Walking out of the store, I couldn’t help thinking: Ah, if only I had the money to go shopping without dashing for the ” Sale” rack! Then, with closed eyes, I would swipe my credit card on a purchase of a flashy new Lamborghini; I would build a mansion on the beach.
Oh, I thought to myself, how happy I would be!
That changed on Sunday.
I was at the airport waiting to board the plane. Feeling hungry, I walked over to a newsstand to buy some candy. Against my better judgment, I snatched a glimpse at the day’s news headlines.
The covers of the multi-readership magazines and papers shouted of conflict, destroyed lives, and immorality. And somehow, most headlines involved celebrities.
Boom! In a flash, the truth hit me in the face, and it screamed: Wake up! See for yourself how fame, money and material bliss not only do not contribute to happiness – on the contrary, they thwart it! These adored personalities, envies of the public, can not enjoy the blessings of normal life, health and family which many take for granted. It’s a heavy price they pay.
*
Wednesday evening, we begin a nine-day non-stop marathon of feasting, dancing, and laughter.
Having a hard time putting a smile on the face after your credit card has been stretched to the max, and you don’t have a clue where to start?
That’s the point! You don’t need to acquire anything to find happiness, because it comes from within. Just look inside and become aware of the unique YOU, by appreciating the fact that you are so special that there is no one in the world like you. Be happy because G-d trusts and believes in you.
If thinking is too difficult, just put a smile on your face. True, you’ll feel like a stewardess. But feelings follow action, and before you know it, it will be for real.
Smile!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Yeshiva student was having a discussion with his rabbi.

“Someday, I too hope to become a rabbi,” said the youth. “Aside from my studies, is there any other all-important qualification I will need?”

“Yes, the stimulus of imagination,” replied the rabbi. “You will have to imagine that somebody is paying attention to what you say.”

***

Call me a greenhorn if you will, but for me this was the first time praying on the High Holidays outside the confines of the Chassidic community in Crown Heights, Brooklyn. This year, I traveled as far out culturally as one possibly can: I returned to Florida, where prayers were held in one of the most prestigious resorts in the world, the Boca Resort.

Part of the package deal of being (or wanting to be) a writer, is that one must always keep his eyes open for good writing material. Ears are always perked and eyes may not rest, for ‘here comes some juicy story.’

So naturally, this Rosh Hashanah, I was out looking for some drama. The woman whose wails would resonate throughout the auditorium, the man who would stand up in front of the congregation and commit himself to breaking up with his non-Jewish girlfriend… the works, you know.

Granted, I did have the great merit to watch as a Jew “bought” an Aliya to the Torah for $100,000! The second runner was pretty close behind. And a Jew parting from his money is pretty dramatic, there’s no doubt about it. Yet somehow, that didn’t do it for me. I was looking for the mushy stuff.

The days passed swiftly in a tiresome marathon of praying, eating and sleeping. And now I sit before the computer screen, pondering recollections of the charged weekend. Nothing seems to stand out. Different? Yes. Unique? Of course! But nothing to warrant the eye twitches of a journalist.

My Jewish sensibilities finally take over the journalistic perspective. Hello! Hundreds of Jews, men and women who hardly ever make it to the synagogue throughout the year, individuals who almost deny their Jewish heritage, felt compelled to come and sit for hours of unfamiliar prayers just because they are Jewish. Is that not awesome?

I was expecting the sights of Moscow circa 1990 the first Rosh Hashanah after the fall of communism, or, better yet, the emotions of Yom Kippur in Bergen Belsen 1946. But that is not what brings out the quality of our people, not as much as a bunch of contented Floridians leaving the comfort of their homes, in middle of a regular Thursday, just to experience G-d.

How awesome are your children, oh G-d?

Two old men have been best friends for years, and they are now in their early 90’s. One day, one suddenly becomes deathly ill. His friend comes to visit him on his deathbed, and they’re reminiscing about their long friendship, when the dying man’s friend asks, “Listen, when you die, do me a favor. I want to know if there’s baseball in heaven.”

The dying man says, “We’ve been friends for years – this I’ll do for you.” And then he dies.

A couple days later, his surviving friend is sleeping when he hears his friend’s voice. The voice says, “I’ve got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that there’s baseball in heaven.”

“What’s the bad news?”

“You’re pitching on Wednesday.”

***

A few years ago a newspaper was launched in England; original and innovative, it was to be the first all-good news newspaper in the world. In it the reader would find only news of donations, births, weddings and the like.

Not to anyone’s surprise, six months later, it declared bankruptcy with a 400,000,000 dollars deficit.

With that in mind, you probably won’t like this email; it will bore you, it will annoy you. You might even stop reading this weekly thought.

Can you guess why?

This email contains good news, a positive perspective. And if statistics are etched in stone and can never lie, then I can rest assured that you will delete this email, and quickly report this sender as spam. The end of the year will mark the end of my career.

So you continued reading – obviously you are curious (what kind of news is this guy talking about?) Here goes:

First of all, if you’re depressed because you feel no one cares, and you feel worthless and empty, then here’s some good news: do you know that there’s someone thinking about you, at least once a week? Yup, that’s me, for as long as you read my email (and send feedback), please consider this email a personal thought from me to you.

On a more serious note: with all that went wrong last year – and I’m sure there was lots of that – you have to admit that there was also lots of good. Remember the smiles, laughs, hugs and tears of joy?

How many times throughout the year did you see the Divine Providence in many different ways? From a chance meeting to a good bargain, from a new relationship to the reparation of a relationship gone cold, you’ve witnessed the hand of the Almighty.

You most probably met someone who believed in you, trusted in your ability to change the world, saw through you, and saw the beautiful person which is you.

Ok, you cry, but these are nothing compared to the half-cup-empty side of life! But what if no one believes in me? What if most of life seems to be a ladder up to heaven yet the angels are all climbing down?

In that case, may I suggest you go to the library, and read the biography of Maimonides, an orphaned child who, at age eight, was kicked out of his home. When you’re finished, go to the American history section and read the story of Abraham Lincoln – the ultimate loser.

While you’re at it, think of all those Holocaust survivors who rose from the ashes and built beautiful homes, and who contributed so much to society.

It is so easy to fall into the trap of harping on the bad – devouring the evil in the news, sulking about disappointments, blaming the world for every frustration. Yet bad news is just that, for it gets one nowhere in life. So here’s the good news. And though it may not sound as appealing as the horrific headlines, it’s the one piece of information you really need to know:

The bottom line is that you are the most special and unique person alive. You can achieve what ever you wish. (I can’t promise a victory against Tiger Woods). And whatever last year looked like, next year will be a greater year of achievement and happiness.

Life is great. It promises to be greater. So as you walk into the synagogue on Rosh Hashanah, put a big smile on your face.

Then make sure to compliment the Rabbi on his tie.

Hey it’s been a while that we haven’t got a good smile, so enjoy.

An elderly Jewish couple, on their way to a vacation in Hawaii got into an argument about the correct pronunciation of Hawaii . He was sure it was Havaii, but she maintained it was Hawaii.

As soon as they got off the plane, they ran over to the first person they saw. “Hi there,” said the husband. “Would you mind telling me how you pronounce the name of this island?”

“Havaii.”

“Thank you,” said the husband gloating.

“You’re velcome,” replied the man.

***

We went to visit a one-hundred-year-old man.

The rabbi told us that this man was lonely: his kids lived far away and his wife was not able to entertain him 24/7. He was also slowly losing his sight and hearing, weakening the connection to the outside world of which a century had passed before his eyes. So a visit would boost up his morale.

Hey, we thought, it would be interesting to reminisce together on horse traffic and the Bronx. And plus, it’s a mitzvah. So we went.

His young wife (84) opened the door, and, after affirming that we were the “ones,” led us into the living room to meet her tall and handsome husband .

The conversation went something like this:

Old man: “What’s going on? I thought only one boy was supposed to come; why do I see two?”

We: “Well, the rabbi asked us to come and we both wanted the privilege of meeting such a nice man as yourself.”

Old man: “Ok. Now before we continue, I want to know – honestly – WHAT’S YOUR AGENDA?

We (shocked): “What agenda?”

Old man: “Come on, tell me, why did you come? You want my money? Is that your agenda? Why else are two young guys spending time with me? I know there’s an agenda. What is it?”

Patiently, we explained about the mitzvah of visiting others, and how we were here just to say hello and wish him well.

He let the matter rest. For the next five minutes.

We were talking about WW1 and the depression, when he stopped mid-sentence and looked at us with accusing eyes, demanding: “No lying this time! What’s your agenda?”

Over the next hour, we heard that question over twenty times. We even have it recorded on camera. It was surreal; here we were trying to show selfless kindness to a stranger, and he could not accept it.

Finally, when the time came to say goodbye, he stood up, and in a chocked voice said: “I guess you guys really don’t have an agenda. It is the first time I’ve seen people coming to visit, or for that matter, doing anything just to be kind. You guys are special.”

As I walked to the car, I contemplated the fact that here was a man who has lived for a century, met countless people and received numerous favors, yet he had to wait to reach 100 to see plain warmth and caring - no strings attached.

A new year is upon us. It’s time to get rid of agendas.

I arrived to the terminal at 12:28 , walked up to the desk, and… was informed that they had just closed the desk and I had missed my flight. No more flights to NYC were set for that day. Oh, how aggravating!

No story or begging I could come up with could convince the airline to let me board, and so I was left with no option but to buy a new ticket on a different airline. Thank G-d, I was given a refund for the missed flight.

With much time on my hands until the flight, I started playing G-d and try to figure out why I had missed my flight; after all, it was the first time in my life that I had made such a mistake. I’m usually one of those who arrive together with the oldies even before the desk has opened…

Having read so many a book on Divine Providence, citing tales of so-and-so who missed his flight and was saved from a crash, or the guy who missed the train and was saved from certain death on 9/11, I could already imagine my plane getting high jacked and…. Blah blah blah… Just like in the movies.

Oh, if such a thing were to happen, what a story I would have to share! In my mind’s eye, I saw myself telling everyone how G-d had watched over me and preaching about how everything is so orchestrated by our Father in Heaven. Feelings of gratitude would permeate my being, and tears would come to the eyes of the audiences. And they would all (including me) turn over a new chapter in their lives.

BOOM…

Suddenly normalcy hit me like a bolt of lightning. How immature my thoughts have been! How cruel! NINETY PEOPLE DON’T HAVE TO DIE, FOR ME TO KNOW THAT G-D WATCHES ME.

Do the twin towers have to fall for me to know that G-d watches over me? Does sickness and death have to strike, Heaven forbid, for us to appreciate the miracle of life?

NO! We can see G-d in the wave of a leaf, and in the breaths we take. Every moment is a miracle, every step monumental. And every circumstance is an opportunity to experience G-dliness – even missing a flight when, Thank G-d, nothing happens.

Let us merit experiencing a truly miraculous world, one where every detail will clearly declare G-d’s glory. May it be soon, with the coming of Moshiach.

Amen.